A NaNo Story

It's that frantic, end-of-the-world feeling. Okay, maybe it's not really the end of all things, but when it comes down to the fact that you're about to write 50,000 words in a single month, the walls around you might appear a little wobbly.

You have this fantastic idea. Nobody can touch it. NOBODY. It's never been done before. You'll be the first. And everyone will tell you how badass your writing skillz are, and that you'll be the next big thing.

/SMACK

Now that I have you back in reality, I'll tell you that you're going to love the first few days. After that, writing becomes pretty intense, gradually fading out. In my wild, crazy, over-the-top imagination, this is how I predict NaNo will happen:

Day 1:  "Oh my God. I love you. Love you, love you, love you. Nobody's going to out-do this idea. Muahahahahaaa." You actually kiss the computer screen.

Day 3: "Only 1,000 words to go. Pfffft. I'll reach 50k before everyone else," you tell yourself, as you munch on potato chips.

Day 7: "This is great. Broke 10k already. Moving at a good pace. Even my plot is starting to make sense!" You begin to sing 80's rock ballads about rocking and rolling all night, only to realize you're not as young as you used to be.

Day 13: "Why have I been staring at the same blank page for thirty minutes now?" you ask yourself, and then get up to grab more Cheez-Its, pretzels and chocolate. Because, somehow, these will help you get past your writers' block.

Day 15: "OH MY GOD. WHAT HAVE I GOTTEN MYSELF INTO?" you scream at nothing in particular; meanwhile, banging your head on the keyboard because that's the only way you'll get words to appear on your screen.

Day 18: "How much longer?" You squint at the faint light squeezing itself through your window. "What day is it?" you mumble.

Day 21: "HAHA SUCKERRR!" You've somehow managed to write 4,000 words. It's then you realize all the sugar you've been eating for the past twenty days has finally caught up. You don't know if you're writing makes any sense. Hell, you don't even know if it's in English. Meh. Who cares?

Day 22: "WTF DID I WRITE YESTERDAY?" Oddly enough, you don't remember writing that scene. Or that one. Since when do your characters let horses ride on their backs?

Day 26: "Must...win...this...contest..." you wheeze out. All your hopes are destroyed--like a nuclear bomb was just dropped fifty miles away and you're living in the radioactive zone--when you realize you don't win a damn thing.

Day 30: "Is it...over?" You look at your word count again and again. Can that be right? You've managed a weak 35k, but it's still 35k more than you had to begin with. As you step outside, you notice everything looks different. But that's just because you haven't seen anything other than your computer screen, sweat pants and EXTREEEEEEEME ENERGY DRINKS in the past month. You're free. You can breathe again. It is done.